Like the Water

My life is a fresh spring in Wisconsin,
Unsoiled, sweet, pristine, clear.
Sprung forth from the mother earth
Naturally filtered of all past sediments.
My Mother treasured me, nurtured me,
Both gave me space to run and held me close,
Protected me from the traits of my father
That would turn me into the same man he was.
And also from the aspects of herself—
She changed herself for me, gave her life to me
Before she had truly lived a life.
I never realized this before now.

She gave her life for me.
And probably would again.

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There’s an App For That

Well, I have my Motorola Droid, and for the most part, I love it. I have a few gripes about it, but I’ll go into detail about that in my secondary review to be posted on GearLive.com.

What I’m really psyched about is this app I found called WPtoGo. It allows you to post to WordPress blogs like this one. I can view and edit older posts, view and review comments, and it even has some basic formatting tools.

So maybe I can post just a little more often on the personal blog, eh? We’ll see. Maybe write some more of my idle thoughts. I’ve worked very hard to tone the emo down, and it has become easier as I work through my divorce and find out who I really am. I believe I’ve made some great strides. I am a much different person than the man who struggled with self-hate and loathing, blaming himself for his cheating wife, unable to truly put the blame where it truly lied and wash his hands of it.

I lost a lot of friends along the way: those who hate me for who I was, and those who drop my various social network friendships for being tired of hearing my depressed rants and avoid me in person. It is unlikely I’ll get either group of people back, but in the end, I can only rely on myself.

So, we’ll see.

First Day of Work in the New Year

…is incredibly slow.  But who would have said otherwise?

I spent the majority of today finishing the new designs on the websites.  I found two new themes that I was absolutely enthralled with, and have been tweaking non-stop.  Made some internal changes, ditched the guestbook over at Spheric which was just collecting dust, and rolled out the new designs today.  Comment, give me your opinions!

Throughout that time, just thinking about life in general.  I wrote a goodbye letter to Dewi.  People may hate me, but I did literally everything I could to save my marriage.  Unfortunately, she simply didn’t want the same thing since the day we were married, and lied and cheated the whole time.  Well, she finally gave me an explanation on Christmas Eve.  She said, and I quote.  “Cheating is in my nature.  It is who I am.  YOU wouldn’t let me sleep with anyone else.  There are men out there who are okay with that.”

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