To Whom It May Concern

I’m sure that you are aware that recently, Wizards of the Coast decided to take a slightly different direction with their prized Dungeons and Dragons content.  They changed many aspects of the game mechanic, gave different entry methods to the game in the manner of modified classes and races, and overall, made the game more accessible to the newer player.

Whether you like the system, or hate the system, it bodes well from a business standpoint.  The old rules will persist for all time; no one would be forced to accept the new rules.  Third Edition rules will be available for people to play.  Besides, no one says that anyone has to play with any set of rules in particular, including the published ones: that’s the brilliance of Dungeons and Dragons!  But, add another layer of Dungeons and Dragons rules that allow “newbies” to get right into the throw of the game, and you have what almost amounts to a separate product aimed at assimilating more mainstream consumer base into your brand name.

People will have their preferences in game, Third Edition, Fourth Edition, or hell, I know some folks still playing Advanced D&D Second Edition.  But, it is still a common standpoint in which we can talk about the adventures we have had, because the emotions and actions span across the gaps of edition rules: only game mechanics change in each edition.  It should put us on a common plane.  And, as businessmen, put us in the line to make a lot of money from each subset of player, by providing the supplies for them no matter what their preferences are, supportively and with great passion for serving our customers.

So, assuming that you are in the hobby business to make money, the following circumstance is of importance to you.

One of my colleagues had the misfortune to be a customer in your shop at the time a certain Clerk was working there.  This colleague of mine is a newcomer to Dungeons and Dragons, and, instead of making purchases online, it was decided to bring her to an actual location so she could have a hands-on choice of the different items she was looking for.  She was extremely excited, and was prepared to drop a good chunk of change on pretty much anything that looked cool.

Her first mission was locating a miniature that matched her character: a female dwarven cleric.  She spent a good amount of time looking through your selection before admitting defeat and deciding to ask the assistance of one of the clerks employed there.

She went up to the Clerk and asked specifically for any female dwarves at all that she could choose from.  His response?  That you don’t carry them because no one plays them.

Now, this could very well be true.  Supply and demand rule over the stock a company holds, and that’s very understandable.

However, only an Idiot would tell a potentially paying customer that no one bothers to assist someone looking for just that item.

Add that assault on the way she games to the fact she is a new gamer getting her first experience dealing with other people in the hobby world, and you have just lost a customer.

Fortunately for you and Idiot Clerk, my colleague had her friends in the store with her who knew a bit more about finding miniatures than her.  Turns out, there is a catalogue of items that she can peruse and locate particular items.  It is a great system so that businessmen such as you and I do not lose out on customers like this.  With the desire being to help every customer we can, even if we don’t have it, we can get it.

So Idiot Clerk has a second chance of making a profit off this new gamer.  If he does it correctly, you might be able to cash in on her willingness to drop money on this new hobby of hers.  We just need to work past the original mistake and show her we mean to serve our customers.

Unfortunately, Idiot Clerk lives up to his name and plops the catalogue into her hands and walks away.

Only an Ungrateful person would throw a chance to sell product in the face of a customer who was just previously offended by you yourself.  Perhaps he Assumed that she already knew what to do with it?

Upset with Assumptive Ungrateful Idiot Clerk, my colleague, who has no idea what to do with this catalogue, decides that she isn’t worth this place’s time, and tells her friends that she’s had enough.

Leaving the store, Assumptive Ungrateful Idiot Clerk decides to follow my colleague and her friends outside, and, lighting a cigarette, proceeds to question them on their opinions of Fourth Edition rule style.

Appalled that this man was so Clueless as to not realize he had treated a potential customer with such short shrift as to lose business for his employer, and then not see it strange to follow them outside to strike up a conversation, they answered that their reactions were mixed to the new version, that it had its pros and cons.

Clueless Assumptive Ungrateful Idiot Clerk proceeded to let them know how much he hated it, listing reasons, and giving alternatives of games that were much better.

Then it all became clear: he feels the need to actively Discriminate against players using the Fourth Edition.  He feels it necessary to air his opinions about how horrible the newest incarnation of Dungeons and Dragons is to anyone who will listen, regardless of the decisions of Wizards to create the game as such, or of his employer to carry and cater to those who play the new edition, and to make sure they know, leaving that store, that they are not welcome.

My colleagues let Discriminatory Clueless Assumptive Ungrateful Idiot Clerk know that they were using Fourth Edition at this very time, and that there were new players playing who were finding it easy to get into.  While my colleagues and I differ in opinion on the preference in Third vs. Fourth edition, we tend to agree that Fourth Edition is best for new gamers.  You and I, as businessmen, know that any product that can get closer to mainstream is a great source of revenue.

Discriminatory Clueless Assumptive Ungrateful Idiot Clerk scoffed and rolled his eyes at their opinions.  So, not only does he need everyone to hear his one-sided opinions, he is Disrespectful towards anyone else’s, refusing even to listen to what reasons someone may have.

Let’s review.

You have a shop that exists to cater to the hobbyists of your area.  You provide items and resources and supplies to those who desire them.  The reason for the desire is a moot point: you, as any good hobby store, want to be known as the “place to go” for these types of supplies.  You don’t care if I am buying miniatures to feed to my dog; you’ll smile encouragingly and ask me “Debit or Credit?”  You desire to make a revenue stream that is profitable by encouraging customers to return to your store for further supplies, carrying a wide range of items so that no matter what their desires are, you have it.  And if you still don’t have it, you can get it.

Most of all, you know hobbies.  You encourage the gaming, you support the sport that is role-playing.  You know that it is the fun time had by all that makes the brilliance of Dungeons and Dragons.  You know that it does not matter what set of rules you play, or whether you stick to any rules you choose, so long as everyone enjoys it.  It is a Hobby.  You are a Hobby Shop.

And, I just wanted to bring to your attention that you have a Bigoted, Disrespectful, Discriminatory, Clueless, Assumptive, Ungrateful, Idiot Clerk who works for you, who makes people feel uncomfortable to be in the store, who makes people feel ashamed at their choice of hobby, who makes people feel harried that their choices are not the same as the ones they would make.  He does not support the sport, he does not support the gaming choices of the customers.  He is not interested in your revenue, he is not interested in the success of the business.

I write articles across the internet.  I have friends who podcast weekly, and write comic strips that are seen across the world.  I have ties with other stores that are the epitome of hobbying and all it stands for.  I participate in social sites that share with others what places ARE the places to go.

And until the above Clerk is relieved from his duties and replaced with someone who knows more about what gaming is TRULY about, I intend to make sure those I care for do not have to ever go through the same treatment my colleagues did by informing them of the situation, and letting them know your establishment is NOT the place to go.